Caught in the middle
by Dory the Fish
Summary: If you know Super Junior continue reading. Reviews are very much appreciated
1. Heart breaks! Heart heals?

**Heart breaks. Heart Heals?  
><strong>Chapter 1**  
><strong>_by Dory the Fish_

A/N: This is in Kim Heechul's point of view. I hope you'll enjoy reading this ^_^

* * *

><p>I have to tell him whether this will hurt him or not, at least it came from me. Here it goes, "I'm seeing Siwon. We are not a couple but he keeps me company." I miss my China Man so bad. I miss him that I can't think straight. I want to do the right thing. The deafening silence sinks in, "Hannie, are you still there?" I asked. "Yes I am still here, Chulie. How can you do this? When I left China to move in with you for work, I was afraid that I might go back to China as soon as I arrived but you made me feel I'm home...with you. We lived in one room for most of our lives in the apartment way before we debuted." He continued, both of us are sobbing "Now that I'm back in China where I thought this is my home since childhood, I felt that I left home because, I left you." I cried harder.<p>

I've been crying for the past 3 months since my Prince Charming left Korea. I thought of the times when we spent our freedays together how we kissed and held each other. "Don't you dare shove to my face that you miss me that much, that this pains you as much as I do? You don't know how hard for me to go on everyday without you." I thought I heard the door squiked until I felt someone squeezed my hand. Now I felt... safe and brave enough to tell him "Do you know who was beside me through all that? It was Siwonnie. All he did is stayed by my side while you're there in China."

"Ugh! I hate you for loving me this much. Mianhe." I hate myself too for loving you this much. He continued, "I know you don't love Siwon as much as you love me." Why does he know me too well? He is right, I don't love Siwon that much but at least he listens to me and keeps sane from the pain inside me. I don't know how I can go through all this if Siwon wasn't there for me for the past few months. "I love you, Hannie. But if you keep seeing other girls there in China, which I will know one way or another, I don't know if this will work." I felt something hard in my throat when I said that to him. I don't want us to end up like this. But if this is the only way for me to move on then let it be. I was about to hangup when I heard, "Chulie~yah! Chulie~yah! My princess, please don't do this to me." "Then think of something to make me stay with you. I want you and you know that. I don't want to hear your empty promises and do something about what you feel." and I put the phone down.

I'm not the type of person who commits in a relationship. My feelings for Hangeng is totally different, he is the exception. I never thought I would fall for someone like this. I didn't expect to be loved by Hannie either. I thought I had a fairytale life, I had good paying job and man who I can call mine. But he just threw everything away when he left me. How could he do this to me? That's what ran through my head and I didn't realize the warmth of Siwon enveloped me. Suddenly tears ran down my perfect skin and I can't stop crying. "Hyung, please stop crying. We know that he needs to go away for his own good. Like he said, he can't work with SMent if they continue to treat him like a slave." I didn't care about the stupid suit, all I want is for my Hannie to be back in my arms. "I know how to make you feel better..." I looked up to him with wondering eyes. What the heck is he...? My thoughts went blank when his lips crashed onto mine. His lips kissed me in familiar sweet way. I don't want to hurt Siwon, my Simba but he keeps on tempting me. Tempting me to love him and hurt him at the same time.


	2. Confession and Confusion

**Confession and Confusion  
><strong>**Chapter 2  
><strong>by Dory the Fish

It's been a year since he left, 9 months since I heard his voice. Well I can't keep up with this kind of relationship with Tan Hangeng. Siwon has always been beside me all this time but I just don't feel the same way for him. "Hyung, are you all right?" he asked while I was in my wonderland staring at those chocolate abs of his. I have someone right here but my heart is in China and he didn't even bother to call me. Hangeng you're such a prick! "Neh, genchahnah." There was dead silence but I was still staring at his perfectly chiseled body. _Oh gosh those abs!_ I have been hanging out with Siwon but we just make out. Hmm, what's wrong with me? I'm the Space Big Star, Kim Heechul. I get what I want so I deserve to be happy even without him.

"Actually, Choi Siwon, I'm not okay. I'm lonely for a year now and I need someone. Someone" I practically stared at him closer like we are just centimeters apart. I can feel his hot breath touches my ever flawless skin as he takes deep breathes like he is savoring my smell. His stare intensifies me. I was about to finish my sentence when, "Someone like me!" he whispered. "Yes definitely." Can he read minds now? "I've always wanted you in the beginning, hyung. I just don't want to lose a friend like you just to fuck your brain out." he said with the struggle to control himself by just standing still for me while I trail some kisses on his collarbone slowly nipping him until that sweet spot turned red. I continued kissing him down until I reached his boxers. I looked up to him and he nodded for permission. He was there standing still and so stiff.

"You know Siwon, you should relax and let yourself go. I know you want to touch me so badly." The stiff and composed Siwon minutes ago became the aggressive one and kissed me passionately. I never imagined him like this, being the one in control. I normally take control and gives command to my lover. I guess Siwon has been controlling himself for a year over the sexual arousal I've given him. I really should stop thinking of things in a situation like this. "Hyung, what are you thinking? This is so not like you. You love to have sex especially when you're with someone so hot like me." Siwon said. "Yah! Stop calling me hyung when we're doing this, arraseo? Just keep kissing me." I said. He made me shut up as we shared a deeper kiss that became hotter. I kept on sucking his lower lip and he let out a moan which is my cue to enter him. My tongue wrestled with his I started to taste his sweet mouth.

I started to struggle out of my own shirt just to feel his skin onto mine. I need to feel him but I need to dominate over him. I grabbed his boxers to expose his hard member. "I didn't expect that I can turn you on, babe." I told him. "Who can even resist your beauty and milky skin?" he said as he continued kissing my hard nipple."If someone can, he is missing all the fun. Ahh! Hee...nim~" he gasped as I rubbed his member with my hand. As I rubbed his member I kissed so passionately our tongues wrestle once more. "Hee~nim. Ah! Ah!" he gasped as I continued to rub his member up and down. I was turned on when he moaned my name like that. "You like that Wonnie, right?" I whispered into his ear as I continued to rub his member. "Mmm, Ah!" is all he can say with the pleasure I'm giving him. "I'll take that as a yes." and I rubbed him harder, faster. "Ah~ Ah! Hee~nim! I need you now...inside." he begged. "Are you sure? I heard you're still a virgin." Yes he is a virgin. If I will continue this, he will think that I feel the same way. I don't love him but I don't want to hurt him either. All he can answer me is his sexy moans and my name."Mmm. Hee~nim. I can take it. Please, I'm begging you!" Hahaha, I'm not this kind of guy who teases his lover, its *crap* Hangeng who does this kind of stuff. I obliged him so I took his member in my mouth and started to suck him. I caressed his chocolate abs while I moved my mouth up and down with his member in me. "Ah! Ah! Hee~nim! I'm...cumming." As he finished his sentence I swallowed him whole. I went to kiss him vigorously so that he could taste his seeds that I swallowed which is sweet.

I quickly took the lube by the bedside table and took a generous amount onto my hand. I grabbed his firm thighs and sticking the first finger on to his entrance. "Get ready!" I told him and plunged in and out of his tight hole. I placed in the second finger and he twitched. "Ah!" he moaned."Relax, Wonnie you will like it eventually." I whispered. "Mmm. Hee~nim!" he moaned again as I prepared him. "I need you. Ah!" he gasped. "What do I need to do, Wonnie?" I asked him teasingly. "Ah! Ah! I need you inside me." Siwon gasped. "Okay, suck me first." I ordered him. He didn't hesitate and grabbed my throbbing member and took it in his moist mouth. "Wonnie! Wonnie~faster~Ugh!" I moaned. "Stop" I told him and took his lips and kissed him again. "Lie down!" I commanded him and kissed him some more. _The taste of his lips is addicting_, I thought as I tasted him more and more. I parted our lips for me to prepare my entrance into him. "Mmm!" he moaned as I slowly entered him. "Ah! Does this really hurt this much, hyung?" he asked. "I told you not to call me that when we are doing this." I plunged into him. "This is for your punishment Choi Siwon. Ugh! Ugh! Ugh!" I plunged even harder into him. "Ah! Ah! Ah! Hee~nim. Please. Ah! Ah! Faster hyung!" I stopped but he grabbed my thighs and made me move. This is interesting. He flipped me over and he continued the pace for me. Now that he is on top I can't do anything other than thrust into him. He stared as he moved. He nibbled my ear and whispered "Saranhe Heenim".

"Ah! Ah! Ah! I'm~Ah~cum~ming! Ahhh" I screamed and before my voice filled the room his sweet lips found mine and the tongue wrestling begun again. "Ah! Hee! Hee! Hee! I'm cumming!" He moaned as his seeds sprayed all over our stomachs and he collapsed on top of me while my member is still inside him. "Are you alright now, Heenim?" Siwon asked me again. Now that he asked I really don't know what to say. For the first time, I'm speechless because of his confession of love for me. "We can go on all night if you're still not okay, my Heehee." he whispered with his velvet voice and smiled beside me. I looked at him still wearing that seductive smile of his. I moved closer to him and whispered "Let's see about that, Wonnie!" and climbed on to him once again and gave him that kiss he wanted from me.


	3. Honesty

**Honesty**  
><span>Chapter 3<span>  
><em>by Dory the Fish<em>

I really miss my China man but then why did I do this? I thought while I lay beside Siwon after an amazing love making last. It was amazing but hmmm. I just don't understand this. Siwon lay still beside me and listened to his heartbeat and smelled him.

"Saranghe, Heenim." Siwon said. This is the third time that he told me this tonight. I don't know if I should answer him truthfully or not. "Siwon" I looked up to him. "I don't need to hear your answer now. I just want you to know how I really feel." He stared at me like he knows what I was about to reply to him. "I like you Siwon. But you know who holds my heart, right?" I know this sounds harsh but this is the least that I can do. "Neh, just remember this" he said as he reached for my face and cupped it with his hand. "I'll be here beside you whatever happens." He kissed me softly and I responded as I deepened our kiss. I can feel him on top of me again. "Aren't you tired Wonnie?" I asked teasingly but actually I'm tired. "If this the way for you forget him, I can go on all night and day like this." and we were at it again.

It's been a month since Siwon confessed his love for me. I love his company but I know that my love for him is not enough. It's nice to have someone who would like to hold my hand. I want him to stay. I want to love him like how much he loves me.

"Wonnie?" I said as I looked at our hands intertwined with each other.

"I want to be honest to you. I love you but I know that my love is not enough." I pondered on this for the past few weeks.

"Heenim, you're silly. Love can't be measured. It doesn't matter how much you love someone, feeling it is enough." he replied as he continued to caress my hand as we sat on the couch watching some random movie on cable.

"Its not that. Its just that, I can't forgive myself for cheating on my heart. I haven't gotten over Hangeng but I let you fall for me." just to forget Hangeng in the process, I wanted to finish the sentence. "Hyung I'm not rushing you to forget him. I just want to lessen the pain that Hangeng-hyung left you." Siwon interrupted me but that is just the reassurance that I need.

I kissed him lightly on his sweet lips. As our lips touched, I heard my bed room door slammed shut. "Nuguseyo? Jungsu, is that you? Who can that be?" I mumbled. "Maybe it was just the wind. Heenim, I'm hungry. Let's eat!" Siwon complained as he got up. "Sure, let's have food delivered here." I fiddled for my phone from my pocket and thought of the kitchen downstairs. I miss his food. I miss him.

Before I could dial, my phone rang and my heart jumped as I read the call register, China Man "Yoboseyo?". "Heechul~yah" he answered.

"Heechul~yah! Heechul~yah, bogo shippo" How could he say this to me now? "I'm here to fix things, fix us." My heart was racing when he said that. I just couldn't believe it.

"Heenim?" Siwon shouted as I collapsed on the floor. "Heenim, what's wrong? Are you okay?" Then he glanced at my phone. "He is back, isn't he?" All I can do is nod in response sitting still on his lap. I can hear Hangeng asked what happened and hang up.

I just don't know what to do. "Don't worry, Heenim, I'll protect you."

"He doesn't need to be protected." I heard someone by the door.


	4. Regret

**Regret  
><strong>Chapter 4**  
><strong>by Dory the Fish

"He doesn't need to be protected." I heard someone by the door and there he was, my China man. Why did he even come back? Does he want me to loose my sanity? I was just holding on to Siwon while I'm curled up like a ball. Siwon is stroking my hair just to make me feel relax.

"Heechul~yah" Hangeng called me. I flinched as those words came to my senses. I can't believe how that endearment took over me. "Heechul~yah! Heechul~yah! I'm back. I hope I'm not too late." he said as he stared over at Siwon. I trembled even more when I heard those words again as he tried to caress me. Siwon carried me to my bed and he stood between me and Hangeng.

"Hannie!" I finally found the courage to call him. "Hurt me with the truth, but never comfort me with lies."

"Wae? Chulie don't do this to me." He gave that look, those eyes piercing mine with wonder. Siwon stood there just ready to comfort me. "Hyung, you better leave. You've given him too much pain when you left." Siwon interrupted. I know that he meant no harm to my Hannie. "Would you just shut up Siwon? Who are you to Heechul anyway, huh? As if Chulie feels the same for you" He said. "Don't you put words into my mouth, Tan Hangeng. I don't feel the same for him but he was beside me when you left, when I was in pain." I stood up and walked towards Hangeng. I stood near him enough to catch the scent I missed for more than a year. I tried not to show how much I miss him.

Now I can feel Siwon's hands grabed mine and intertwined, as if reassuring me that he will be here to catch me. "Can you please leave Hannie? I can't stand this anymore. You loved me then left me. Now you want to fix us when I'm all broken and barely breathing?" I was screaming my heart out. I just can't control the tears that are welling up in my eyes. "Please leave me alone."

"Heechul~yah!" my Hannie begged. "I'm not leaving Korea until you will talk to me and sort things out."

"I said GET OUT!" I screamed once more and fell to the floor. "Heenim. Don't worry I got you." Siwon whispered to me. I just let him hold me and cried even harder.

"Yah! Kim Heechul! What's the problem?" I heard Jungsu shouting and looked at Hangeng then to me.

"Hangeng! When did you arrive?" he asked hannie. "Just in time to hear what Siwon confessed to my Cinderella."

"What's the matter here?" No one answered. Silence filled my room but heart is screaming in pain. "Siwon, can you please explain what happened here?" Jungsu asked. "Well hyung. Uhm!" as Siwon started Hangeng standing by my bedroom door looking away from me. "Teukie, I'll come back some other time. I don't think this is the time to talk." he said as he faced towards the direction to the stairs. "Heechul~yah." I didn't dare to look at him because I know he doesn't want to see my tears which were meant for him. "I just want to tell you that I regret leaving you. I still love you. Remember that every second spent with you is a second I wouldn't want to trade for anything in this world so don't let go, Heechul~yah." I tried to take in the words he said and realized. "Hannie! Wait!" I ran past Jungsu who is still in shock of everything that happened.

"Hannie!" I called but I was too late. He drove away from the dorm. I headed back to the front porch and held on the door tried to stand or else my thighs will fail me again. I took another step and almost fell down on my knees but some grabbed me just in time. "Siwon help me bring Heechul to the couch." he said.

"Now can you tell me what happened? Hangeng wouldn't be back here for a reason." Jungsu started as he stared at me with his worried look. I know I shouldn't be making him worry about me. "He said that he missed me and we need to fix things." I said to Jungsu and he lend me his shoulder. I want to tell him everything that I feel. I want my Jungsu hyung to be here for me at the same time I don't want anyone to worry about me. So I decided to go to my room and lock myself up. "Thank you, Hyung." I told him as I patted his shoulder and left him sitting on the couch. I stood up and walked in to my room. Then I heard him called out "Heechul. Let's talk about it. Don't lock yourself up again." I was just on time to shut the door before he could stop me. I grabbed my mp3 player and put on the headset and turned up the volume enough for me not hear anything from Leeteuk's worried voice behind the door. I sat on my bed as I listened to my song, the song I composed for my star, my China man. I regret not stopping you walk out that door again, I thought as tears flooding out my eyes again.


	5. Comfort after the Nightmare

**Comfort after the nightmare**  
><span>Chapter 5<span>  
><em>by Dory the Fish<em>

I haven't eaten anything and I didn't dare to go out my room. The pain is just too much to bear. I know I shouldn't be this childish but I have to keep this to myself. I don't want to see Siwon because it will just pain him to see me like this, wasted. I don't want to see Hangeng cuz the sight of him will break me again. "Heechul, you need to come out of your room sometime you know. Its been three days and you haven't eaten anything." That's what Jungsu yelling behind the locked door. He's worried again, I thought. "Leeteuk hyung, what happened? I thought you talked to Heechul when I left 3 days ago." I heard Siwon talking to Jungsu. "I give up Siwon, he wouldn't listen to me. If you need to break this door just for him to listen and eat something please do so." The door sprang open. Just as I thought, he could open my door cuz I gave him my spare key.

"Heenim. You have to eat something." Siwon said. I stared out of the window and continued to wonder why I said those things to Hangeng, my Hannie. "I know you love Kimchi fried rice so I brought you some. Come on let's eat hyung. Please." He said as he continued to beg for my attention. "I don't need your pity, Siwon. Go out!" I shouted. "But hyung, at least eat something. I don't want you to get sick just because of Han-" he stopped as I took a bite from the kimchi fried rice he brought. "Now can you leave? I need to be alone. I need to think things through about us." about who I should choose, I thought. Siwon left and I can feel his stare before he closed the door behind him.

That was all that I ate for next few hours. I lay there and I tried to sleep but I have too much in my mind I can't even have a peaceful sleep. Then I finaly dozed off.

"Hyung. Hyung. Wake up. We need to go on stage." Hmmm why is this guy waking me up when I just closed my eyes. When I opened my eyes I'm inside the dressing room. Why am I here? I thought the Super Show is done. Hmm wait are we in Beijing? I need to compose myself. This hoodie. Everything is sinking in. I walked to my seat on stage to prepare for the next song.

As the song started I tried to stop my tears from flowing. But as the chorus was repeated the third time, "Shining Star! Like a little diamond, makes me love. looking at me with the sweet simle that's like a dream to me, whisper to me, we'll always be together, 'til the end of time" As the VCR played again and saw Hannie through that big screen, I cried even harder. Once the song was over the lights went out and I couldn't stand up from my seat. What the? Turn on the lights, I can't see a thing.

"Heechul~yah!"

What's this? who is that?

"Yes?" I replied. "Hannie, what are you doing with that gun?" What the heck! "Whatever you're planning don't do it, please."

"Heechul~yah! If I brought you pain when I left you and I can tell you're more in pain when came back then I should leave you forever." he said as he cupped my face which fits perfectly with his hand.

"What are you talking about? I didn't ask you to leave me." I replied with tears tried to escape from my eyes. "Heechul~yah! I love you, mianhe." is all he could say. Saranghe, I thought. Before I could say anything he took the gun to his head and took the shot.

"Hangeng! Why did you?" I screamed. "I told him that we are together, Heenim." I turned around and Siwon was standing behind me. "I love you, Heenim. Hangeng doesn't deserve you. You're too precious for him. Saranghe, Heechul~yah." he continued as my tears flowed endlessly from my eyes.

I felt the tears from my eyes and a hand holding me tightly like someone wants to wake me from my nightmare. "Heechul~yah! Heechul~yah!" I jumped when I heard him again. "Hannie!" I screamed and hugged him tightly in my arms like I need to know that he is still alive. "What's the matter, huh? I'm here. You just had a bad dream."

"Hannie, promise me one thing. Please." I whispered to him as I continued to hug him and cried. "What is it?" he replied. "Promise me don't do something stupid with a gun." I continued. "What?" he said. "Whatever happens don't leave me. Don't commit suicide. Stay by my side." I was stuttering as I continued. "or at least in my heart." I cried as he continued to stroke my head and held me in his arms. "Shh. Stop crying, my Cinderella. I'm here now. I'll be here until you're okay, until we are okay. Why would you think I'll do that? Listen." he said and cupped my face with his left hand. "I never left you. I'm just not here physically but you will always be in my heart, my Cinderella. If I'm the Prince of China then you are my Princess. Remember that, okay?" he assured me so I nodded in acknowledgment. He held my face for a moment and claimed my lips with his.


	6. Undecided

**UNDECIDED**  
><span>Chapter 6<span>  
><em>by Dory the Fish<em>

He kissed me softly. I missed this. Then I pulled away. "If you will leave me after everything is okay, please stop this. Stop making me making me a fool!" I said almost loosing my temper again. "Heechul~yah! Did I break my promise to you?" he said. "You never did until you left a year ago." I replied. "I'll be right back. I'll just get something from the kitchen." Hangeng stood up and went out of my room.

I stared out the window and thought of what will happen after all this. He will leave me again that's for sure. But why do I keep on believing that he will still love me even how hard I push him away. I want him to be beside me. I just want us to be together. My thoughts were interrupted when the door sprang open and Siwon went in.

"Heenim, are you alright?" Siwon asked. "Yes, I'm fine. Hangeng said that I fainted so he massaged my hand so I woke from a bad dream. Wait." I remembered my dream and got paranoid. "Did you say something to Hangeng? Did you say that we're together as couple?" I continued. Siwon just looked at me with those adoring eyes of his and said "How can I say that when I don't even own your heart, Heenim? You said so yourself that you'll try. I'll wait for that day." I stared at him with lust. Since when did I release? months ago? No, just days ago but it feels like it was months ago. Crap I hate it when I get horny around Siwon.

I just stayed still as I controlled myself. "Heenim, did you know its been a while since I released?" he said. My eyes widened as he said those words. He loved me too much. "Kiss me." Just like always he complied with the most torrid kiss I tasted from his sweet lips.

"Mmm!" I moaned as Siwon hugged me feeling my skin under my shirt. "Shirt! NOW!" I commanded. I don't need to give him further instructions cuz he himself knows what I mean. As I looked at him as he took off his shirt I saw Hangeng standing behind him. "Hannie?" I gasped. "I went to get the Beijing fried rice I cooked for you and this is what you wanted? Why didn't you say so?" Hangeng exclaimed as he undressed before me. "Go out Siwon, Heechul and I have some other matters to attend to which doesn't include you." Hangeng hissed as he crawled to Heechul's bed still holding the Beijing fried rice for his princess. "Don't be mean hyung, I came here first." Siwon demanded. Siwon stayed still infront of me. "You're not leaving?" Hangeng shouted. Omo I need to see this. "No I'm not leaving." Siwon replied. "I want you Heenim. Can't you see me?" he said as I kissed me again. I simply responded because its a lust that took over me and not love.

I felt that Siwon was then pulled away from me and *BAM* Hangeng punched him. Siwon got up and tried to hit Hangeng but his reflexes are too good. Then Leeteuk came "What the? Yah! Stop it! Hangeng! Siwon! STOP IT!" Leeteuk shouted as he tried to stop them while I sat there perfectly still dumbfounded by what happened. But then it seems that both Siwon and Hangeng didn't care about Leeteuk at all.

That's it! They are too much! "YAAAAHHHH!" I shouted at the top of my lungs as I ranted my temper out and then curled into ball, trembling. "Why are you shouting hyung?" Sungmin asked as he, Kyu, Yesung, and Ryeowook entered my room. Hangeng and Siwon stopped hitting each other as soon as they heard my scream. Leeteuk came to me and held me. I tried to calm myself but its no use.

"Look you two," Jungsu stared at Siwon then to Hangeng, "you better explain to me what happened here." For me there is nothing to explain further in this scenario Jungsu, can't you see? I thought. I wanted to say something but then my trembling didn't allow me to. "YAAAAHHH!" I shouted again. "Heechul, stop shouting. Are you hurt?" Jungsu asked. "I can't choose between them." I said still trembling. Silence fell in the room.


	7. Can you see me?

**Can you see me?**  
><span>Chapter 7<span>  
><em>by Dory the Fish<em>

The next day I went to my commitments since I missed 4 days and I can't forgive myself if Jungsu keeps on covering for me. I need to work to keep my mind off of things. Maybe not seeing them would keep my sanity. But then Hangeng kept on popping out everywhere I go. I think Jungsu handed him my schedule. I hate this. How can I even work while someone is stalking me? It's okay that fans would stalk me as long as they wouldn't harm me but this is different, he is Tan Hangeng my first and last Love. I loved someone before but his love is totally different.

As my last commitment is done I left and noticed Hangeng standing by the telephone booth wearing a hat as a disguise but I can see him clearly. I approached him and said "Hey their stalker. Go home!"

"I know you noticed me since this morning." he replied. He took off his hat so that he could look at me. His eyes captivated me once again. How can you not love someone who treated you like a princess and calls you Cinderella? "Go home stalker." I said. He just stared at me intensely. He stepped closer to me he examined my face. I stared at him and noticed he didn't change. He is still handsome. The soft lips I long to touch with mine. Those eyes can melt me every time he stares at me.

"Mianhe Heechul~yah! I want you to be happy." he said as he cupped my face and claimed my lips. I can feel him wanting me more than anything in the world. He pulled away. "We need to talk." Hangeng said. "Sure. But can we have dinner while we're at it." I replied. He took my hand and we walked to my car parked nearby. "Let's go to your dorm then, I'll cook for you. I know no one's there right now." Hangeng winked as he took my keys and opened the door of my car for me. "I'm driving so relax, just hold my hand and relax, hmm?" I nodded as my reply and a smile escaped from the corner of my mouth. He started the car and I held his hand from time to time. He knows me too well. He knows that every time that I'm riding the car I need at least someone to hold on to. Hangeng caressed my hand. I love it when he knows me too well but I still can't understand why he left.

As we arrived at the dorm he immediately went to the kitchen to cook. I followed him and asked, "What are you going to cook for me?". "You're favorite, kimchi fried rice." he replied. As soon as he finished cooking I thought of what the date is today and then I realized how time passed by. No wonder he's been following me all day. I need to think of something. I love him and I want him.

I stood up and approached him as I took his hand."Now that we're done with dinner, can we have dessert?" I said as we entered my room. "Wae? What's for dessert then" Hangeng asked when I turned to meet those seductive eyes of his. "This." I replied and gave him the kiss that we both missed. The kiss got deeper and deeper. Before he could suck my lower lip for entrance I pulled away. "Happy birthday, Hangeng!"

Once my lips found his I sucked his lower lip to gain entry in to him. I led us to the bed and pushed him down. "Is this what Siwon taught you?" Hangeng asked as he saw me took a bottle of chocolate syrup from my drawer. I didn't mind his comment. "Take off your shirt now." Once he took his shirt off I pinned him down and glazed the chocolate syrup on his abs ending down to his member. I took a little syrup into my mouth and started kissing his collar bone and nipped the sensitive skin. I trailed kisses as I licked him clean as I nipped him. Before I could start on his member I looked at him and gave me that smile that I loved the most. I took his length in.

As the taste of chocolate is gone and his taste is taking over me I bobbed my head faster feeling his member went all the way inside me. I love his taste. "Heechul~yah! Ah! I'm cumming...ahh!" I took his seeds inside me. "Thanks for the dessert." I said and he still can't believe how chocolate can be this so sexy. "Its my turn. I want my dessert too." Hangeng sat up in front of me and took the bottle of chocolate syrup on floor. "Open your mouth for me, Chulie." he asked and I complied. Hmmm now what's he going to... Before I could think he crashed his lips into mine and his tongue went in to taste the chocolate. The kiss went deeper and deeper as Hangeng savored the chocolate inside me. I was too busy tasting him in my mouth I could feel his hands creep on to my throbbing member and thrusted it up and down. "Ah!" I moaned as he went on faster. "I want here you say my name, Chulie!" he said. He went faster and stopped and took my member into his mouth.

"Ah~ah! Hannie. Mmm." he moaned and bobbing my head faster. I know that I'm gonna cum so I turned him around and now I'm on top. "Stop." I took the lube immediately and took some on my hand to prepare his hole before I enter into him. "Now you're teasing me." Hangeng complained. To calm the impatient Hannie I claimed his lips and gave him my sexiest kiss ever. I know his hole is tight so I immediately pushed 2 fingers at once. He winced at the pain so I deepened our kiss to distract him. "Relax. I know you missed me." I whispered to him. After I scissored him inside I poked my neglected member in to his hole. I need to release now. I thrusted slowly inside him for him to adjust. "You're too tight. Relax." I knew it he can't do it with someone else. I gave him too much pain since I went out with Siwon. I plunged in my member all the way inside him. I continued as I hit his sweet spot. I grabbed his member and rubbed up and down.

"Mmm. Ah! Chulie-ah! Ah!" he moaned my name again. "Faster~ah! Chulie"

"Ugh ugh ugh ugh!" I plunged faster inside him in rhyme as I rubbed his member.

"Ah! Hannie." I called out and his lips caught my moan, like he always did before. Tears escaped my eyes as I remembered. He kissed me deeper in me and "Chulie. Look at me. Please look at me." he pleaded as I continued to thrust in him. I can feel that I got harder inside him and plunged even faster along with the rhythm of my hand rubbing his shaft. "I'm cumming Chulie!" his seeds are all over my hand and cupped his face to kiss him again. He licked my hands cleaned and "Ugh Ugh Ugh! Hannie. I'm ugh ugh cumming." I could feel my fluids filled him in and I collapsed in top of him.

Our eyes met and he looked at me intently. "Heechul~yah! Can you see me now?" he asked. My answer will change everything I can feel it because I can hear his heartbeat in melody with mine hovering his.


	8. The UPSIDE

**The UPSIDE**  
><span>Chapter 8<span>  
><em>by Dory the Fish<em>

It was 6 in the morning and I really don't want start a fight or even shed a tear after a beautiful night with my Prince. "Heechul~yah! Can you see me now?" he asked. I can't answer him. NOT YET! I want to tell him it's him that I love and not Siwon. But I don't want to hurt my Simba. I got up and started to pick up my clothes from the floor. I got dressed and turned to look at him. "Look Hangeng. If you want me to choose now, you will leave me again." I said as tears starts to flow through my eyes. "You're bound to leave me again." I turned away from him and headed to the door.

"Heechul~yah," Hangeng called out as I felt his hand grabbed me. I don't want to look at him now that my eyes are filled with tears. He cupped my face as I was staring at the floor. I can't dare to look at him. I tried not to look at those eyes of his but his touch seems to hypnotize me. I brought myself to look at those sad eyes of his. "What should I do to prove my love for you?" Hangeng asked. "I don't know Hannie. It's for you find out. I know that you know me too well and you'll find out sooner or later." I replied. I picked up his clothes and gave it to him. "Grab these and leave. I don't know why you're still here in Korea while you're career is doing good back in China. Go back to China, Tan Hangeng." I shoved his hand to free myself from his hold on me. I opened the door to make him go out.

Hangeng froze where he stood all dressed. It's easier to talk to him. "Cinderella, I'll do everything that I can to know what you're talking about. Remember that I want you to be happy. If it means that I have to leave I'll do it for you, my princess." As he finished his parting words to me he approached me and kissed my forehead and brushed his lips to mine. I can't help but sob the tears out. He walked out the door yet again but I know he will come back. I want him as much he does and I know he will not give up. He is as stubborn as I am. I tried to walk back to my bed get some sleep before I start my day.

Two weeks passed and I haven't heard a thing from Hangeng while Siwon is sweeter than ever. We go out to eat dinner after I finished my commitments for the day. During his free day he will accompany me to the video shoot or to my radio show. But then I remembered what Lee Soo Man told me, "Heechul, you can date anyone within the company. Just tell me before anyone else finds out." I am about to fall for this guy. But then I remembered Hangeng. Did he even try to find out what I mean before he left two weeks ago?

Today is my free day so I didn't bother to wake up as early as 6am. But then my phone rang "Siwonnie." I answered. "Heenim. What are your plans for today?" he asked. I just want to spend time with him. "Just come over the dorm and let's just watch TV or something." I said. "Arraseo. I'll be there in a few minutes. Heenim?" Siwon said. "Hmm?" I replied. "I love you." he said sweetly. "Just come over and we'll talk about that." I hanged up and started towards the bathroom to prepare.

I got dressed and I heard someone down the hallway. "I'm here." It's my Simba. I ran to greet him with a hug. I wrapped my arms around his neck and took in his scent to my senses. "Simba" I said. He hugged me tight like we haven't seen each other for years. We haven't each other for just hours. He looked at me and gave me that admiring look of his. "I love it when you call me that." He said and his lips found its way to mine.

I was about to deepen my kiss when I heard "Get a room, will you?" I pulled away and looked over by the couch. It was Leeteuk watching TV. "Jungsu, I know you miss Kangin so much. Don't be jealous of us." I said. "I'm hungry Heenim. Can we eat first?" Simba said. I nodded as my reply. He went to the kitchen to prepare the food he brought for us to eat. I sat beside Jungsu as I wait for Simba to finish preparing. "Haven't you noticed Hangeng is too silent in China?" Jungsu asked. "Yeah hyung, his career was booming when he left Korea more than a year ago. But then when he went back from his visit 2 weeks ago I haven't heard any news about him." Kyuhyun stated. Well they are right I have heard a thing from Hangeng since our last conversation 2 weeks ago. Jungsu came closer to me, "Are you really in love with Siwon, Heechul?" he said. "I love him in my own way." I replied and smiled at him as Siwon looked at me. But I'm trying, I thought. "The food's ready Heenim. Let's eat." Siwon called.

As we finished our meal Siwon took out 2 slices of cake from the fridge. "Are you ready for dessert?" he asked. "Are you fattening me up, Choi Siwon?" I teased. "Not really but I think your getting skinnier when you pushed Hangeng away." Simba said as he placed the dessert infront of me. The chocolate mousse cake is beautiful with an elegant silver ring on top. "Wae?" I shrieked. "What's this Simba?" I asked him as I showed him the right I found on top of the cake. He took it and knelt his right leg and took my right hand. "Kim Heechul, would you like to move in with me? In a different apartment from my parents of course." he stated. "WAE?" I heard Jungsu and Kyuhyun shouted in unison as they heard what Siwon asked me. "I don't know what to say." I said still speechless for the first time in my life.

"I've entered your world and you treated me right. I know we don't have the same beliefs and see things differently," he said. "Yeah, really differently" I whispered. "But my feelings for you didn't change. The more I know about you the more I fall for you. I love everything about you and I want you to be my Princess in my castle. Simba wants to protect Cinderella by his side." my Simba stated. I still can't believe that he is proposing to me. I have to make the right decision. Silence enveloped the room while Siwon remained still.

"Yes, my Simba I will move in with you." I finally answered him. Siwon gave his sweetest smile and stood up. He wrapped his arms around my neck and I wrapped around my arms around his waist.

"I love you, my Princess." he whispered.

"I love you too, my Simba." I replied and he gave a kiss. The kiss like that felt like our first.


	9. Queen?

**Queen**  
><span>Chapter 9<span>  
><em>by Dory the Fish<em>

A day after I accepted Siwon's proposal I immediately called Lee Soo Man to inform him about us. Soo Man asked me to meet him at his office to discuss about the matter.

As I entered his office he gestured me to take a seat. "It's good to know that you have moved on. But are you happy?" Soo Man asked. He knows about my relationship with Hangeng and how depressed I was when he left. He is more like an appa to me and I respect him that much.

"Yes I am happy. He gave me a reason to understand things without insisting on my demands." I said with sincerity. "Let's say Simba tamed Cinderella and protected her so well."

"Well then if that is your decision. I'll give you my blessing." Soo Man said. I stood up and bowed, "Kamsahamnida." I said. "When are you moving out? I need to schedule someone to deliver your stuff to your new apartment." He said and took out his phone. "Thank you, but that has been taken care of. Did you forget that I'm moving in with the Prince of Korea?" I winked. "I thought your heart is with the Prince of China." he stated.

I flinched as he said that. Why am I fucking affected? "He had my heart and he will always have my heart. My decision is not a change of heart rather a new love blossomed with Siwon's sermons and sweetness." I said and turned towards the door. "Heechul, I hope that your decisions will not you in the process." Lee Soo Man said. I stopped as he said that. "Remember I just want what's best for you. Your happiness matters the most." I looked at him, "Thank you, abeoji." I finally left his office.

When I arrived at the dorm all my stuff are loaded to the moving truck. "Where are Heebum and Bangshin?" I shouted and saw two cages with them in it. "Don't load these to the truck I'll bring them myself." I told one of the ajusshis and he nodded.

"Hyung! I will miss you." Kyuhyun ran towards me and gave me a hug. "I'm not leave the group you idiot. I'm just moving in with Simba." I said but Kyu hugged me tighter, so I hugged him back. "It's different when you're not around. I'll the only evil one here." And of course the evil brothers will be immaterial for now. "I'll miss you too evil maknae." and kissed his crown and I went to the living room where the rest of the members were. "I hope you're doing the right thing Chulie." Jungsu said worriedly. "No, not the right thing but what makes you happy." he smiled and gave me a hug. "Hyung we hate your arrogance and your temper but we love you. We will certainly miss you." Sungmin said and hugged me. "Group HUG!" the teary Ryeowook said and all of them gathered around me and we hugged each other for more like 5 minutes. "Guys we will still see Heechul hyung during our performances, concerts, and recordings so let's not give him this sad scene. "I definitely agree with Shindong" someone said from the door. "Simba!" I shouted and forced my way to him. "I'm here to pick him up. Don't worry guys I'm not taking him away from you guys. We are still Super Junior. We are family." Simba said reassuringly to the rest of the members. He is holding my hand and looked at me. "Are you ready, Heenim?" he asked. "Yes, I'm ready." I replied. "Kaja!" he said. We left the dorm together.

As we drove away from the dorm I realized how much people around me loves me. A few years ago I was attached to only one person and didn't care about them. When he left depression sipped in and I felt loved by them despite the fact that I constantly push them away from me. I looked at Siwon who is driving us to our new apartment, our new home. This person is one of the people who would laugh at danger, who would stand my constant cursing and will say I love you and I'll take your suffering for you. He hasn't said that to me but I know that he will do that. I know how much he loves me. I just want to love him too. I hope I am Home with him.

We arrived at the new condominium in the heart of Seoul and it was a grand. "Welcome to our castle, my Queen." Siwon said as we stepped out from the car. "Queen?" I said. "Since I own this complex it makes me the King. That princess thing is getting old." he replied. No one called me as big as queen. I think it's too much but its okay. I'm too proud of my beauty anyway and this is how he appreciates me. I hope that he will not grow tired of me.

He grabbed my hand and we walked towards the lobby. "I hope our apartment won't be too much for you." Siwon said as we stepped in to the elevator. As the elevator dinged and the sign says 15th Floor the doors opened and the big hallway greeted me. I walked to the living room where the 72 inch Bravia HDTV is mounted on the wall with the Playstation 3 and Bluray player is placed below it. Then I saw the kitchen with nothing much aside from the fridge full of chocolates and soju. Its just the soju that he got right for my taste. I walked down the grand hall and I noticed a glassed room. I opened the sliding door and the Jacuzzi. The bathe filled with aromatic scent. It's not the kind of aromatic scent that makes you relax but erotic. I was about to call Siwon over and I turned around he is behind me wearing just his boxers. "The place is beautiful, Siwon~ah!" I said. I stared at him and looked down to his perfectly chiseled abs. He stepped closer and we were just centimeters apart. He cupped my face and gave me his godly smile. "I want to create a new world for you. I want to give you all the happiness in the world. I am your King and I will never ever leave you." He reached down and gave me light kiss as our lips touched.

"Welcome Home, my Queen." that felt like our first.


	10. No REACTION!

**No reaction**  
><span>Chapter 10<span>  
><em>by Dory the Fish<em>

"Is that your final decision, Hangeng?" I asked him. "Okay fine. I really can't imagine you have decided that way. I hope you will be happy." I told him and hanged up. I really want what's best for him. If this is his decision I have to do something right.

More than a year ago he told me he is leaving Korea and he needs someone to handle his career in China. Since we are good friends I told him I could handle him well. Everything was set and I told him not to tell anyone from his group about this especially his roommate.

When he left for China, he was nervous not of what will happen in China but how Heechul will take about the situation. I know about their special relationship and I am kind of responsible if they will never be friends again. It may be Hangeng's decision to go back to China but I influenced him to leave Korea for good and he is better off as a solo artist.

That's it! I have to tell Heechul everything.

**Siwon's POV**

Wow it's been a week since we lived as a couple and I thank God that everything is going good between me and my Queen. I cooked for him something I only know of, sausage and eggs. It smells good so it's fine. "Heenim, breakfast is ready." I called to him.

"You know how to cook?" Heechul asked while he is rubbing his eyes. "Fortunately yes I know how to cook. Apparently the person who loves you knows how to cook because you don't know how to cook or bother to learn." I told him sarcastically. Heechul fell silent and gave me a smile. I was expecting a different response like a spank or something but he just gave me a smile. I set the food for two and placed them on the dinning table. "I'm not really a fan of this food but it's good." Heechul said. I nodded in response while I chewed my food. "What are we going to do today, Simba?" he asked. "Let's watch TV for awhile and cuddle a bit." I said. "Arraseo." He replied and he turned on the TV.

We were watching a Strong Heart and laughing our hearts out then my phone rang. "Siwon~ah Hangeng is on TV. Turn it on now." Leeteuk said. I changed the channel to what Leeteuk said. "Bwohya? Hangeng!" Heechul exclaimed as he looked at me as shocked as I am. I nodded in response. Silence filled in the room and Heechul is clutching my arm.

"Good morning. I am Tan Hangeng. I'm here to announce my withdrawal of my case against SM Entertainment. I need to run after the love of my life." Hangeng stated. I saw him shook his head in disbelief. "I feel that my purpose to come back to China is gone for I left someone. I was too selfish to think of what I feel and didn't consider how others would take in the situation that I made. I hope that my fans will understand my decision. SM Entertainment has nothing to do with this. It's time for me to listen to my heart." As he ended his statement, a sentence flashed below him.

**Hangeng, leaving for his love?**

I know that Heechul loves me. I mean I feel that he loves me truly but I know him too much that Hangeng has a special part in his heart. I was afraid that he might do something really bad after this news. Heechul is still holding me as he stared at the TV. "Heenim, gwenchanah?" I asked him as I stroke his hair. I hope I could read his mind right now so that I would know how to take care of him. He turned to me and gave me his intense stare. I looked into his eyes with worry filled in my mind. As my eyes met his plump lips and he bit his lower lips as I looked back in his eyes. He leaned towards me and nibbled my ear.

"Do you know that you're turning me on, Siwon?" he whispered to me.

What? Why is his reaction like this? "Heenim" I said as he leaned to me closer until we are just centimeters away. Why is he like this? I mean he should be angry and throwing stuff in the air by now but he is doing this. God help me save him. "Siwon! Stop calling HIM. He wants you to taste me." he said as he breathed in like savoring my scent in to his senses.

As I took in his breathe as he exhaled, I couldn't resist his sweet scent that captivated me. Please forgive me Father for I have sinned. I thought as I leaned closer too him and brushed my lips to his. Our lips crashed and he took the initiative to make the kiss even deeper.

I just love to taste him, he is right. I can't resist my queen as I asked for entrance and licked his lower lip. He granted my request. I explored inside him, it feels like I'm new to this cavern but I memorized everything bit of it. He is bittersweet and I like it just like his temper. As our tongues wrestled I could feel a moan escaped from him. I know he liked this.

As we entered our room Heechul's legs wrapped around my waist as hands gripped his thighs. We approached the bed and I undressed him in one swift move and he let out a gasp. I know he didn't expect me to be this aggressive. I mean he knows that I'm innocent when it comes to this kind of thing but I tried to learn something to treat my queen just right.

"Surprise!" I whispered to his ear and nibbled it a bit before I claimed his lips again. I took his member and stroked it up and down. "Ahh!" he gasped as I continued to rub his member. Another gasped was about to escape from his soft lips but I catched in time as I kissed him passionately. The kiss got even deeper as I stroked faster and faster. Heechul broke the kiss to catch his breathe "Ahhhh! Simba!" he moaned. "Yes, my Queen?" I responded as I stroked faster. "I'm..ugh..cumm!" he couldn't even finish his sentence as he spilled his seeds all over my hand. Heechul stayed still lying on the bed still on a high from the pleasure I gave him. I took the opportunity to cover my fingers and throbbing member with his seeds to preparing him for the ride of his life.

I grabbed his thighs and entered a couple of fingers into his hole. I went in and out and he kissed me all of a sudden and grabbed my hair sweetly. I couldn't continue to tease him any longer so I pecked the head of his cock as I inserted my member to his puckered hole. He gasped as my whole length went inside him. I slowly went in and out. I maintained a slow pace until Heenim complained, "Faster, Simba."

I went faster and picked him up as we are both in seating position. His arms are around my neck and his legs wrapped around my waist while we bounced our way to our orgasm. I took his neglected member in my hand just in time as we go faster. "Ugh! Heehee Heehee." I moaned as I stroked his member up and down as I got a hard on. "Mmmm!" is all Heechul could say as I pounded on to his sweet spot. "Look at me my Heehee. Look at me!" I said as I reached my climax. He stared at me with those beautiful eyes of his and I stared back. "Ugh Ugh! God you're hot and tight." I told him and his legs is locked around my waist. "Simba! Simba! I'm cumming. Ahhh!" Heechul said and his seeds are all over my hand. "I wanna pound you, babe." I whispered as we continued to be in a sitting position. "Satisfy me, my king!" he whispered back and nibbled my ear seductively.

I got hold of thighs despite my sticky hands because of his seeds. I stood up as we are still connected together and I pinned him towards the wall. "Ahh!" Heehee moaned. "So this is what you meant about pounding." Heehee said. I continued to drill my member into him "Ugh Ugh Ugh! Heehee" I moaned as my climax as about to rise. "I'm cumming! HeeHee" I said as I continued to stare at him and Heechul just smirked at me. "Ahh!" I moaned again as I filled him with my seeds. Heenim is everything to me. I will make him happy even if it means that I have to leave him. His smirk turned to a smile and gave me the kiss that we both shared passionately.


	11. Forget

**Forget**  
><span>Chapter 11<span>  
><em>by Dory the Fish<em>

**Siwon's POV**

"Hyung, why is his reaction like that? He should be angry or something but what happened is the total opposite." I told Leeteuk hyung as we continued our conversation at the balcony.

"I can't believe it either. This is not the Heechul I know." Leeteuk said as he looked away and thought for a while.

"You have a nice view here Siwon. You treated Heechul as a princess. Must I say, this is your castle, you're the King and Heechul is the Queen." he said and patted my shoulder.

"Let's take a seat hyung. Do you want something to drink?" I offered.

"Let's have a coffee. This conversation will be a long one." hyung stated.

I went to the kitchen and grabbed 2 cans of coffee. I went back to the balcony and gave hyung one and sat down.

"Looking back Hangeng gave all his attention to Heechul. He even let Heechul treat him like a slave but he has no problem with it. Heechul on the other hand." hyung paused and looked at me then took a sip of his coffee. "Heechul simply grew attached to him. He didn't realize that everyone in the group cared for him too."

That's right he didn't even see how much I cared for him. I didn't have the courage to tell him then because I thought my feelings for him is a wrong thing. I've confessed a lot to God about this but when it's Heechul I couldn't tell him.

What does Hangeng have that I don't possess?

Why do I feel like Heechul is not mine entirely?

"Siwon" Leeteuk said which brought me back to my apartment. "I know that this may sound silly but I believe that Heechul has moved on from his darkest days. I mean you were his light then. Do you know that you were the only one who can make him eat when Hangeng left? You know that he is skinny and I will not forgive myself if will get skinnier than he is now." he said.

"Really? I thought Eunhyuk made him eat something?" I replied.

"Hyukie is just his conscience or something. He listens to you differently. Just think of it this way. Hangeng is his past you are his present. Make every moment with Chulie special. If Hangeng comes back just prepare yourself who he will choose." Leeteuk said.

"For now, hold on while you can and I know he loves you enough to live with you in your castle. Please mend him in ways you can. I am the leader of our group but you know that I am only human. I, for one, misses my Young-woon very much but I'm holding it in just to be strong for the rest of you." Leeteuk confessed as tears started to flow from his angelic eyes.

"Hyung, I'll do whatever I can. With God's help I know we can survive this. Kangin hyung will be alright too. He's got a year left so please stay strong hyung. If you need someone to talk to, remember I'm here." I told him as I hugged him and he sobbed.

"Gomawo, Siwon." he said as he wiped his tears. I handed him my handkerchief and gestured him to keep it.

"I better get going Siwon. I have to check the dorm if they are not messing around. Those kids need a mother not a leader." he said jokingly.

We walked to the elevator and I wrapped my arm around hyung's shoulders. As the elevator dinged I gave Leeteuk a comforting hug.

"Just remember hyung to seek for God's help and He will definitely guide you. I'll always pray for Youngwoon's safety." I whispered to him and he hugged back.

"Thank you Siwon. I should be the one who is comforting you but I guess it ended up the other way around." said Leeteuk.

He stepped in the elevator. I hold the elevator before the doors closed between us.

"Kamsahamnida, Siwon. Just hold on and believe in Heechul. It took him a lot of courage to decide something this big. Thank you for taking care of Heechul for me. He may not ask me to take care of him but I know that he doesn't want me to worry about him. Annyeong!" Leeteuk waved goodbye and I did the same as I stepped back from the elevator.

**Cheng's POV**

This is it. I have to hand this to Heechul. I have to hand this over. I approached the receptionist in the lobby of his condo.

"Annyeong haseyo. I have a package for Kim Heechul. I have to personally deliver this to him." I said to the receptionist.

"I'm sorry ahjussi but we can only accept the package for him and we can assure you that he will receive it." I hate this freaking policy. I guess Siwon owns the place.

"That's not my point. This package is too precious and this must be read by only Kim Heechul. I came all the way from China just to bring this to him. Please I'm begging you just let me go up to his penthouse to explain to him about this package." I said.

"Let me check if someone's in his unit." she replied. She talked to someone from the phone.

After a few minutes she gestured me to go up and instructed the bellboy to assist me. Thank God they let me deliver this journal. This might be the only way for me to save Hanchul.

**Heechul's POV**

Why did he decide to withdraw his case? Does he know the consequences that he has to face? He is just suicidal.

I continued to think of what he said, "I feel that my purpose to come back to China is gone for I left someone. I was too selfish to think of what I feel and didn't consider how others would take in the situation that I made."

Who is this person that he left?

If it's me, no it's not me.

It's not possible.

I mean he left me without a word. He came back to Korea a few weeks ago but still he left me. I guess he doesn't love me anymore.

Why am I thinking this way when I have my King beside me?

We had a great sex last night and I didn't expect him to be that aggressive. I guess I taught him too well. I should forget Hangeng. I should be loyal to Simba and only Simba. He gave me another life line and I'm grateful that he came into my life.

Hangeng, as time passes, I'll still be erasing. Ever since you left and until now it's so hard. Hannie, forgive me for forgetting you.


	12. The JOURNAL

**The JOURNAL**  
><span>Chapter 12<span>  
><em>by Dory the Fish<em>

I wonder who this guy is. I never had anyone over aside from my hyungs. I hope he is not a stalker or something. God please save me from evil people. The elevator dinged and I stood straight to greet my visitor. The doors opened and I was surprised who was standing before me.

"Cheng~hyung?" I said in shock.

I mean he is the manager of Hangeng. If he is here then Hangeng might be here in Korea too.

"I was afraid that you wouldn't recognize me, Siwon." he said as he approached. He bowed and shook my hand.

"What brings you here? Please let's go to the living room." I asked with full of curiosity.

"I am here to hand something to Heechul. Is he around?" Cheng asked as he checked out my apartment.

"He is not here. At this time he might be at the radio station preparing for YoungStreet. He won't be back until later tonight." I explained.

I just want him to go and leave the package he is talking about.

"I see. I'll just come back some other time then." Cheng stated.

"No. Just leave the package here with me. Don't worry I'll give it to him as soon as he arrives from work." I said nervously.

I need to have the package because I have a feeling that this has something to do with Hangeng. I have to have that package before Heechul knows about it.

Cheng then thought for awhile and stood up.

"Look I trust you Siwon. I know you're not selfish like I was. I'm here to somehow fix things. This is the least I can do for Hangeng." Cheng said.

He slowly walked towards the elevator.

"Cheng~hyung. I'm just wondering, is Hangeng here in Korea?" I asked him.

"He may be here. I don't know. I'm not handling him anymore. I better get going. I need to catch my flight back to Shanghai." Cheng hyung said.

As soon as the doors closed I stared at the journal that Cheng left on top of the coffee table. I grabbed the journal and flipped it open. Is this Hangeng's handwriting? It's in hangul. I was amazed because his writing is better. I guess he loved Korea. Before I started reading the first page a little note fell on the floor. I picked it up and it read.

_Heechul, please read this journal of Hangeng. This will clear things up between you two and you will understand why he left in the first place. I hope that I'm not too late to hand this to you. Hangeng can't get over you. He still loves you and it hurts for me to know that you have Siwon in your life._

Let me just read this and let's see if this is worth reading. There are some pages left unwritten. I guess this is about a quarter of the journal full. The first page is read "Hangeng's Journal"

My psychiatrist told me to start a journal. Well nothing will loose if I'd make one. He said that I should put my emotions here in this little notebook. I hope this works. I would rather not leave a date on every entry because it will just make me sad and remember the memories that I long to erase. Its been a month since I left Korea but I just can't understand why I feel so lost. Its like something is missing. I just can't pin point what that is.

My career is doing well and I heard that Super Show 2 is doing great. I was going about my usual routine with my laptop and I came across some pictures from the Super Show 2 in Beijing. SiChul all over the place. What the heck! I have no right to react like this but, why do I feel like punching Siwon?

Wow I really made him angry because of the ss2 Beijing stop. He does love Heehee. I continued to flip a few more pages further. Then I noticed that there some pages that are folded in the upper right corner. I wonder what this means. I guess I have to read those pages.

It's been three months since I left my Cinderella. My heart shattered when I saw him crying in a fancam. They were singing Shining Star and he cried harder when he saw me in the VCR. Right there and then I decided to call him. I missed him. I missed his smile, his laugh, his smirk. I didn't understand why I waited for 3 months to call him. I must hear his voice again even if it means that he will be angry. I like it when he is angry especially when I know how to calm him down. I took my phone and called him.

"Heechul~yah! Heechul~yah!" I said as he picked up his phone. All I can hear from the other line is the unusual silence that he gave me. "Heechul~yah! Please tell me you're still there. I want to hear your voice. I miss you." I said. "Hannie. Why did you call? I haven't heard from you for 3 months and you call me now just to say that you miss me. I don't know you anymore, Tan Hangeng." Heechul finally said something. "Heechul~yah! Mianhe." is all I can say to him. "Look I want to be honest with you." he said. I listened intently to what he is about to say to me. "I'm seeing Siwon. We are not a couple but he keeps me company."

After he said that my world crumbled and the hope that we could fix our relationship is long gone. I can see the light of hope for both of us but it's too far away. So everything that happened in Beijing is true. Siwon loves my Cinderella. "Hannie, are you still there?" Heechul said bringing me back to this painful reality. "Yes I am still here, Chulie. How can you do this? When I left China to move in with you for work, I was afraid that I might go back to China as soon as I arrived but you made me feel I'm home...with you. We lived in one room for most of our lives in the apartment way before we debuted." I replied to him. I just can't control my emotions my tears came flowing and flooded my cheeks. I sobbed but I could still continue, "Now that I'm back in China where I thought this is my home since childhood, I felt that I left home because, I left you."

I could hear his sobs. A few minutes after I heard the closing of the door and I could sense that it was Siwon who entered the room. He was saying what he felt and all I want is to take every bit of his anger just have his heart back. All I want is him beside me even if it means that I have to cook for him every day. "I know you don't love Siwon as much as you love me."

That conversation is something that I want to forget the moment he hanged up on me. Now what? I have to work hard to earn myself a very long leave. I just have to talk to him personally.

I want to stop reading this but I have to know. My heart aches as I recalled what happened a few weeks ago, how Heechul reacted with our fight with Hangeng. I should be the one protecting him from pain and misery and not giving him suffering just because of my selfish feelings. I just have to continue reading this journal.

As I was driving to the SuJu dorm I need to compose myself. I came here not to pick a fight with Siwon but to talk with Heechul and fix things. I want him. I need him. He is everything to me. I wasn't thinking straight when I decided to leave SMent.

Looking back all those years I spent with SMent, the training and all, I should be thankful because if it weren't for them I won't be where I am today. I wouldn't meet Heechul who changed me entirely. Cheng is a good friend and I know he didn't mean to make me leave without notice. I didn't think that I was about to hurt someone along the way. What if I thought things through? What if I just talked with SMent about what I think? Would things be different? Those are the things that bothered me for past few months. What good would it do when the damage is done? Especially the damage is between me and Heechul.

I must not let him go. I overheard Heechul and Siwon in his room and I know that Chulie still loves me. I just have to pursue him again. I want to stay by his side forever but my selfishness won me over. I hope I'm not too late.

What the? So that's what it is. I want to give this Heechul but I'm afraid to loose him. I continued to read to the last entry.

Two days ago, I almost killed Siwon. I don't know myself anymore. I punched Siwon and he is a good friend. What happened to our friendship Choi Siwon? I even thought I am about to punch Leeteuk hyung too. I am growing as a monster because of Heechul. Am I possessive? No I shouldn't blame this to Heechul. I decided to leave and its normal for Heechul to hate me for leaving him.

I apologized to Leeteuk hyung and begged him for Heechul's schedule. I didn't need to beg because he remembered my birthday so I went on stalking Chulie all day and night. I just want to know if he is living a normal life. I just want a reassurance that he is happy even without me.

I cooked for him that night and I felt that he remembered my birthday so he teased me a little and we had a blast. I was planning to leave him if he is happy without my company but then it turned out that I needed him the most. I need to figure out what he wants to claim him as mine again.


	13. Comeback

**Comeback**  
><span>Chapter 13<span>  
><em>by Dory the Fish<em>

I still can't believe that he is standing before me. I should start fixing things and treat him better. His talent is really something and Heechul might appreciate it that this man is back.

He bowed before me and I stood up and bowed to him.

"Lee Soo Man~ssi, I'm here to make amends. I hope you will still accept me. I've talked with Cheng~hyung about this and he is willing let me off." Hangeng said.

I'm happy that he is back and I'd do anything to keep him here. Keep him home.

"Welcome back, Hangeng. Now let's talk about the terms. Tell what you want, I'll give it all to you." I replied to him.

**Siwon's POV**

I'm still clutching the journal in my hands and I didn't notice the time. I'm not ready to loose my Queen. I love him but I can't let him go. I don't want to be the selfish one. I believe that there is someone meant for me. I have to do something. I love you Heehee.

My phone rang and I was surprised at the call register, Lee Soo Man.

"Siwon, where are you? We have a meeting in 10 minutes." he said.

"I'm at my apartment. Neh, I'll be right over." I replied and Soo Man hanged up.

At his office all of the members were there. I sat beside my Queen. He looked at me and I took his hand.

"I missed you" Hee whispered.

I gave him a peck on his cheek and took in his scent as I sat. I feel uneasy. I kept looking at anything in the room. Then I felt someone squeezed my hand. I looked at Heechul's hand and looked at him.

"What's wrong Simba?" he asked.

Hangeng's back! But then it seems that I lost my voice. I just shook my head.

"I know something's wrong, Simba. Just tell me." he said giving me a worried look. I just couldn't look at him straight in his eyes. I don't want him to know what I just found out.

**Heechul's POV**

I'm looking at him with worry because Siwon keeps on looking everywhere in the room. It's like he wants to go out of this room.

"Good evening everyone. How are my boys?" Soo Man entered the room with a light mood.

"Just fine." as we answered in unison. Everyone is present except for Kangin of course.

"I rarely call you out for a meeting but I want to personally tell you the news." Soo Man said. Hmmm I wonder what this could be.

"Someone is reuniting with us aside from Kibum. You can come in now." he called out.

YAHHHH! HE CAN'T BE SERIOUS?

I thought as I sat straight still holding Siwon's hand. I could feel his hands tremble, so I rubbed my thumb and made little circles to calm him down.

As the man went in I want to kill him. Tan Hangeng is BACK! Crap, I hate this. I'm staying beside my King. I would rather be with someone who would not let me go than someone who abandoned with no good reason.

**Hangeng's POV * the awaited POV of ALL***

I entered the room and the first one I noticed is Heechul's puzzled look. I know he will be surprised but then I was surprised too. I saw him holding Siwon's hand tightly. That should be me holding him and not HIM. Everyone was happy to see me again but then only 2 people are sitting still.

"I know I have caused too much trouble in the group especially to the company. I hope that I could repay you guys." I said and turned to Heechul.

"Mianhe" I told him.

Heechul stood up and let go of Siwon's hand. I want him to kiss me again. I want to feel him under my skin. But I was disappointed, "Welcome back Hangeng. Don't think that I forgive you for hurting me." he said and he didn't stepped any closer.

My hand longs for him. I long to taste him. I have to hold myself back for now. Patience is a virtue and I know something is in store for me if I wait.


	14. GetAway

**GetAWAY**  
><span>Chapter 14<span>  
><em>by Dory the Fish<em>

**Siwon's****POV**

After the meeting with SM I'm worried that Heechul will simply leave me. I think this is what they talked about before Hangeng left. This is what Heechul wants Hangeng to do, to comeback to SMent and be with him again. I have to have faith in Heenim. If he leaves me... I'm not ready yet. I'm not ready to face the fact that I'm just his rebound guy.

We left the SMent complex and I was following Heechul to the parking lot. "Heechul. Can we go somewhere?" I asked him. He turned around and said "Sure, let's go somewhere private. Can we go to Namiseom?". I just can't say no to know to his request especially when he is giving me his aegyo again. He may be mean but he knows when to use his pretty face to his advantage. "Ok we are going to Namiseom." I said as I closed the door and started the engine. "Its gonna be a long ride so don't sleep okay. Just keep talking." I said.

"That's not a problem. Can I hold your hand while I talk to you?" he said. Hmm I think he is in the mood. "Of course you can, I'm your King and you're my Queen. You have the very right to hold my hand." I said as he took my hand and made some little circles. I checked the gauge and we have been driving about 32 Km. We are about half way there, thank God. "Heechul. I have to ask you something. Please answer me truthfully as possible, arraseo?" I said. "Okay. What is it?" he replied. I have to use the right words to ask him. "What do you think about Hangeng being back?" I asked. "Hmm, I was shocked when I saw him enter the room. I want to slap him for leaving. But I want to hug him and welcome him." he said. I'm afraid that he would say that. I kept driving as turned left through a hidden pathway through the woods. "If you are thinking that I could simply run back to Hangeng, you're wrong." he stated and I suddenly stepped on the break in shock. "YAH! What was that for?" he said and punched my arm. I couldn't help but took him in my arms and hugged him tight. "I can feel that you were worried when Hangeng entered the room, you were trembling. That's why I asked you to go out here in Namiseom. I can't leave you now that I realized something." Heechul said. "Wait where are we?" He noticed that we are not on the main road but rather in a private estate. "Welcome to my rest house, yeobo." I said as I opened his door for him.

He wasn't amazed by the European inspired rest house, well manicured front lawn, a beautiful staircase leading to the front door of the house, or the fully furnished rooms until he entered a very intimate room with velvet red wall paper and 4 poster black bed with hot pink colored cats on the headboard. "This place is gorgeous." Heechul said. "I hope I am your world now. All I want is your happiness. You are everything to me Kim Heechul." I said as I hugged him tightly and I could feel him breathe in my scent. "Is my scent really addicting to you?" I asked as I pulled us away. I looked at him intently and he gave his sweetest smile yet. "Do you know that you are my drug that keeps me sane?" he said as his hands playfully went under my shirt to undress me. I let him do so because he turns me on and my boner is showing. I couldn't deny that to him cuz he kept grinding on it. "Heenim. I wanna tell you something before we do our dirty deed." I whispered to him before he starts nipping neck and gave me an interesting look as he heard the phrase dirty deed. "I trust you Heenim. Just remember that I'll be here for you no matter what. All I want for you is happiness even if it means that I have to let you go. Nol Saranghe, HeeHee." I stated. His arms are wrapped around my neck and he smiled again for me and tears escaped from his eyes. I wipped them with my hand. "Stop crying, jebal. I can't stand you crying again." I said. "I'm not crying because I'm in pain. I'm crying because I'm happy." Heehee said. He leaned towards me and nibbled my ear little bit. "I'm happily in love with my Simba." he whispered.

I couldn't hold back the happiness I felt when he finally said those words I long to hear from him. All I can do is bury my face on his neck to assure myself that I'm not dreaming. I pulled back and cupped his face as my lips found his. "Let's try the bed, Simba." he told me breaking the kiss. "I'm way ahead of you, my QUEEN." I said. I picked him up as his slender legs clasped around my waist , my hands on his thighs and the tongue wrestling begins again.

**Hangeng's****POV**

This is it, I'm moving back in the Suju dorms. When I entered my old room I noticed Heechul's stuff are missing. Wait, no one told me he moved out. "Eeteuk hyung, did Heechul move out?" I asked Leeteuk as he passed by the hallway. "Yes he did just a few weeks ago. He moved in with Siwon. Didn't Heechul tell you about that?" Leeteuk said. I am glued by the door of my room. He moved in with Siwon! What heck am I doing here anyway? He should have at least told me that he moved so that I wouldn't rashly move back here. Now I feel that I don't have a home.

I suddenly felt an arm on my shoulder and patted me on the back. "I know why you came back. I know that you really love Heechul. To be honest, I'm surprised when Heechul accepted Siwon's proposal." Leeteuk said. I'm still in shock and couldn't respond to what Leeteuk said. I just can't believe this is happening. "Hyung, am I too late? Did Heechul finally let me go? If he does, I couldn't take that easily." I said. "That should be me hyung. That should be me who's beside him right now. That should be me who held his hand in that meeting. Leeteuk hyung help me, if I lose my sanity I might as well jump off the cliff." I desperately said to him. "Hangeng, please don't think of things like that. If you really want him back you've got to earn him back. Just don't stop loving him. Did you know that he was in a struggle for a year. Siwon was there for him. I guess he is just repaying Siwon, this is just my opinion okay. You've got to talk to him, one on one."

"Thanks hyung. I guess I'm going out tonight to have a drink or two." I said as I closed the bedroom door behind me. I have to go out. I have to fill in the void. I have to getaway for just a few hours from this pain.


	15. Pursuing my Heart

**Pursuing my Heart**  
><span>Chapter 15<span>  
><em>by Dory the Fish<em>

**Hangeng's POV**

Everything is a blur. I couldn't see anything until I saw him standing before me. He is looking at me with teary eyes. "I'm glad to see you again, Hannie." he said. I took his hand and held it. "Heechul, I love you. I'm here now." I said. My princess broke the eye contact as he stepped back and turned his back away from me. He walked further and I saw another guy from afar. I couldn't see it clearly who the guy was. Heechul wrapped his arms around his neck and they shared a passionate kiss. Cinderella kept kissing him down to the guy's neck, nipping him. Then the guy noticed me standing still, staring at them with envy. As I looked at the mysterious guy, I recognized him. He just gave me a smirk, the smirk I never thought he could give anyone. _Siwon!_ I thought.

"Heechul~yah! Heechul~yah!" I called out. "Hangeng, you're just dreaming. Wake up!" some one is trying to wake me up. "YAH! Wake up, Tan Hangeng!" he shouted. Wait I recognize that voice. "Heechul!" I shouted and gave him a hug. "I'm so happy that you're here. Are you moving back in?" I said. "No. I just came to visit Jungsu and the others and I heard someone calling me." he said blushing a bit. I am still hugging him but he didn't respond. "Let go of me Hangeng." Heechul demanded. He didn't change at all. He is still the stubborn Heechul I knew. I let go of him and I can still see him blushing. Heechul stood up from my bed. He walked to the door and I ran quickly to stop him. "Heechul~yah! Please stay." I said as I hugged his back. "Hangeng, can't you see I love someone else now?" he said. I want to hold him like this even if he wouldn't respond to my touch. "How could I see that when I can feel that you still love me?" I said. He turned to me and I continued, "I know you still love me and I don't know why you're doing this to me. Why are you pushing me away?"

"I'm not pushing you away, Hangeng." he said. I stepped a little closer and cupped his face that fits perfectly with my hand. "I want to move on like you are right now." Heechul confessed. "Who said I moved on? Who said I gave up on you, on us? Heechul~yah! I loved you when I left. I loved you when I came back. I will always love you." I said. I'm still holding his face and his eyes bore the sweetest look he gave me. I grabbed his nape and brought our lips together like before. We kissed like we never separated. We kissed like the lovers that we used to be.

Heechul broke the kiss, the kiss that I longed for weeks. "Hangeng, we should not see each other. I love Choi Siwon." My body froze as I heard those words from him. "You will always have a special place in my heart. Siwon is my world now. I hope that you understand." he said as I felt his hand stroked my shaking hand. "You can't say that until I've proven myself to you Heechul. I'll win you back. You are my world." I gave him another kiss, a more passionate one. He didn't respond at first but he gave in. He kissed me back. As my hands playfully invaded him, he pulled away from me. "Hangeng, Stop. I have to go. Siwon is waiting for me." he said and went out the door. "Kajima, KAJIMA." I said but he left me in emptiness.

**Heechul's POV**

I ran out as fast as I can before I could do something to hurt Siwon. I heard him and my heart ached. _I have to do this Hangeng so that we could move on,_ I thought. I want to stay beside him. I want to feel him under my skin. I want to touch him. This went on and on through my mind. When I turned to the block I stopped as a car almost ran over me. I collapsed because my trauma for cars came into me again. I couldn't see anything. It seems that my sense of sight went down but I could still hear. I could hear the car door closed and someone grabbed my arm and guided me to the front seat. "Heenim. Are you alright?" I recognized that voice. I could feel the car moving again. I quickly grabbed his hand. "You can hold me, my queen. Everything's gonna be alright." I turned to look at the guy who picked me up. I stared at him as his image grew clearer. "Siwon. I'm glad to see you." I hugged him tight as we arrived at the apartment complex.

**Hangeng's POV**

I ran after Heechul when he left the apartment. I ran for him. I want him to stay with me. I want him and nothing else. "Heechul~yah!" I called out. "Heechul~yah, come back." I called out again. As I saw him turned to the block I heard the tires squeaked and I ran faster as my imagination ran wild on what might happen. When I saw him on the ground all numbed by the shock, I saw someone unexpectedly.

Siwon stepped out the car and quickly took Heechul to the front seat of his car. All I can do at that moment is to look at them. Everything seems so slow. I want this moment to end because my heart breaks every second of it. That should be me taking care of him.

_**That should be me, Heechul~yah. **_Those were the words I want to tell him. I came back to reality as Siwon drove away with my Heechul. Now what? Soju. I need to drink. I went to nearest store and bought 12 soju bottles and decided to drink in the apartment. At least it will be near my bed when I'm blacked out.

I woke up with a headache. Ouch! I need to take an asprin or else Leeteuk will not be happy about this. "Hangeng get up, you need to go to the photo shoot for the new SJM album." Leeteuk said behind the door. "Yes, hyung. I'll be out in a few." I replied to him. I got up and I noticed 12 empty bottles on the floor. No wonder my head hurts. I quickly took a shower and changed to descent clothes. I grabbed all the soju bottles and went to the kitchen to dispose them. I grabbed anything that I could chew and settled the garbage bag by the trash bin. Leeteuk noticed the bag and peeked inside. "Tan Hangeng, when did you drink this much?" Leeteuk asked me as he pointed the garbage bag. "Since last night" I said and continued to eat the kimchi fried rice that Wookie cooked. "Are you sober?" Leeteuk said. "Yes, I am." I answered. "Wow hyung, 12 bottles in one night. It's a good thing that you're still standing." Ryeowook stated. "I don't think those affected me at all." I said to Wookie. I noticed that Leeteuk looked at me worriedly. "Eeteuk hyung, don't worry I'm sober and I can go to work, ok?" I said to him and patted his back. "I'm not worried about that, Hangeng." he said. "I'm leaving now. Wookie are you coming?" I called out. "Don't worry about me, hyung, I'll be alright." I looked at Leeteuk~hyung still giving me that worried look of his and he eventually gave me a smile. Ryeowook ran towards the door. "Hyung let's go!" Wookie said. I broke my gaze towards my _omma_ and waved goodbye.

As we arrived at the location for the photo shoot, I saw Siwon getting ready. I want to punch him but I couldn't. If I hurt Siwon, I'll hurt Heechul too. I composed myself and went to the dressing room to get ready. As the stylist told me to sit down for my make up, I saw someone beside me. Siwon's being touched up too. I want to tell him that he should take care of Heechul or else I'll take him away. Instead, "Siwon, you should take care of Heechul. He loves you more than you think". I could see him surprised of what I told him. "Hyung, why are you telling me this?" he asked. "I saw you yesterday. Heechul was running because of me. I was trying to stop him but you came."

The director called me out and it was my turn for the shoot. After a very long day everyone packed up and Wookie came to me. "Hyung do you want to have drink?" he asked. "Thanks Wookie but I drink alone." I said. Ryeowook grabbed my arm and swayed like a little boy, "Please hyung can I come with you? Since when was the last time we had a drink?" I shook my head. "Please hyung, I missed you." He said and gave me his aegyo. I sighed and gave up. "Let's grab some soju as we go home, Ok?" I said to him. He jumped in amazement and we went to parking lot. As we drove to the store I got a message from SM saying, I sent you your plane tickets to Shanghai for the weekend don't tell anyone about this. Call me tomorrow and I'll explain to you everything. I wonder what this is for.

Back in the dorm everyone gathered in the living room. Everyone was there except for Heechul who has a radio show in a few minutes. "Hangeng you're home. Since you came back we didn't throw you party that's why we're here." Leeteuk explained to him. "You don't have to." I said to him. I couldn't help but smile as I looked at them. They are my brothers. We are all brothers. I couldn't afford to pick a fight with Siwon just because of jealousy. I looked at Siwon with envy in my mind. Siwon is lucky to have Heechul's heart.

As the night grew deeper, everyone was laughing at Shindong's dance to the tune of Rain's Love song. I laughed a little but drank a lot. This is my 12th bottle and I'm almost done with it. It's as if the alcohol is not sipping in my senses. I want to be drunk but my body doesn't allow it. As I finished my 15th bottle and everyone is asleep on the couch, I decided to continue my drinking in my room. I grabbed a couple more bottles. I turned and I saw Heechul. I stopped and stared at him. He is wearing a red shirt and a pink sweater with a hoodie. His pants look great on him because his ass is firm. Hmm my boner? I could feel that I'm turned on but I tried not to provoke him any further. "You guys had a drinking spree and you didn't tell me?" Heechul said as I was about to turn towards the stairs. "YAH! Are you avoiding me?" Heechul called out and grabbed my hand with soju bottles. "You don't drink. How many bottles did you drink?" Hee said. Heechul gave that worried look of his that I never saw from him. I stared at him and tried to give him the most painful stare I could give him. It's true I'm in pain because I'm not the guy that makes him happy.

"Stay here. Let's drink." Heechul pleaded. How could I resist temptation? He dragged me to the kitchen and pulled 2 chairs for us to sit. He took the bottles from my hand. Heechul gulped down the other bottle and I just stared at him like crazy. "Heechul~yah! Heechul~yah!" I said. For the past few weeks before I decided to come back, I felt numb. I thought that I don't love him anymore. Heechul put down the bottle and folded his arms and leaned on the counter. "What's wrong with you, Hangeng?" he asked. I could feel tears running down my face as I looked at him. My mind couldn't put into words what I felt for him. I couldn't fathom what happened between us. I took his bottle with my free hand and I walked away from him. I could hear someone walked towards me and hugged me.


	16. Intervention

**Intervention**  
><span>Chapter 16<span>  
><em>by Dory the Fish<em>

**Hangeng**

**"Heechul, why are you doing this to me?" I asked him. I couldn't think of something why he is hugging me right now. I mean he shoved me away yesterday and now he wants me to stay. "Can't we keep our friendship Hangeng?" Heechul said. I want to break free from his hold but he hugged me tighter. "How can we be friends when you're hurting me?" I replied. He let go of me as I could hear his sobs. "You better wake Siwon up. You're here to pick him up, right?" I said. I didn't look at him as I walked to my room because I don't him to see me in pain because of him. It's enough for him to know that I'm in pain than making him see what I feel. I went to my room. I lie down on my bed and I noticed that my boner is not showing. I guess being emotional makes me relax. I found the plane tickets that SooMan told me. This is for Shanghai and I have no idea why I'm going there. Whatever that is, it's for me to find out tomorrow.**

**SIWON**

**I woke up and its 11AM. Crap I need to visit my dad. Ouch my headaches. "Good morning, yeobo. Does your head hurt? You drank too much last night. Here have your breakfast first and then take the asprin." Heechul set the tray on the bed. "Hmm this smells good. Did you cook?" I asked. "Of course I didn't cook that. I got that delivered." he winked. He set the tray on my lap and he sat beside me. I nodded and ate. It's weird because all I can remember is Heechul hugging Hangeng's back. I must trust him. I shouldn't doubt him. "Is something bothering you?" Heechul asked. As soon as I took in the medicine I looked at him. "Did you hug Hangeng last night?" I asked him. If I trust him I should be true to him. "Yes we did. Actually it was for us. We need to have a closure. I'm sorry that I made you worry. Mianhe." he said. I cupped his face and looked at him intently. "It's okay. I just have to know what happened last night." Heechul looked at Siwon and he can't stop crying. "Why are you crying? Jebal. Stop crying." Heechul ran out from the room. I have to leave in a few minutes and I have a surprise for Heechul too.**

**I quickly took a shower and dressed appropriately for my dad. It's been awhile since I visited him. I miss him too. "Heechul, where are you?" I looked for him all over the pad. I could hear sobs from the bathroom and I knocked lightly on the door. "Heechul, please stop crying. Let's talk about this." I called out. I could hear footsteps approaching and he unlocked the door. I turned the knob and I looked at him his eyes were bloodshot red and his nose is red too. "Heechul, I'm sorry if I made you feel upset. I just need to know and you know me when I'm drunk." I took his face. "Mianhe. Please stop crying." I wiped his tears with my thumb and he looked at me. "Saranghe. I love you, Kim Heechul. Please stop crying." He looked at me and noticed that I'm all dressed up. "I'm gonna be okay, Simba. Where are you going?" he said. "I'm going to my dad's office to visit. I'll be back before dinner. Are you sure you'll be okay?" I said. "Yes. I'll stay here and wait for you."**

**We walked towards the elevator. "What do you want me to bring for you?" I asked holding his hand entwined with mine. "I just want you to come back safe." He let got of my hand pressed the button of the elevator.**

**I arrived at the Dong Kwang Neul Land Corp Building. I came here a few weeks ago but I wasn't able to see abeoji. I took the elevator and pressed 15. The elevator doors opened and stepped out and I bumped a lady wearing black slacks, white blouse with a blue V neck vest. Her outfit brings out her assets especially her perfect breast. I'm admiring her as I helped her pick up the documents that fell on the floor and some blueprints. I think she is an engineer or something. But why does she look familiar? "Mianhe." I said as I gave her the documents. She just bowed and ran. I wasn't able to ask her name. What the heck? Why am I thinking like this? **

**I entered my dad's office and he greeted me. "My boy, you're handsome than ever. How are you?" abeoji said and gave me a hug. "I'm fine, abeoji." I said. He gestured us to sit down. "What brings you here my son? Did you miss your old man?" he said. "Of course I missed you dad. I'm here to tell you something. Dad I hope that you'll understand what I'm gonna tell you." I said. He looked at me intently. "Abeoji, I'm in love with someone and he is a guy. I want you to meet him tonight during dinner. I want to spend my life with him." And there was silence. "Jinja? Well, to be honest I'm shocked but I'll try to take in what you said." he said and stood up and looked out the window. "The dinner?" I asked. "Of course, I want to meet this guy. I'll call your mom about this." he said. "Kamsahamnida, abeoji." I hugged him like a little boy should. I guess I miss him this much because we didn't spend much time when I was a kid. "Choi~ssi, you asked for Kwon Ha Neul, the Head of the Marketing department. She's here now." I heard his secretary and the door opened. The lady from earlier stepped in with all the documents that she brought. Kwon Ha Neul, why is her name so familiar? "Siwon, this is Ha Neul don't you remember her? She is a family friend. You two used to play all over the office." he said. "Are you the kid who keeps on crying when I the day is over?" I only remember one girl when I was a kid. "I am guilty as charged. I was that girl." Ha Neul said and she reached out her hand. I took her in for a hug. "Ahw Haneul I thought I would never see you again." I said as hugged her. I can't believe it. The only girl I loved is here before me. "Ehem! I think you two should get together during lunch. Haneul, report to me after, I need those blueprints for the new DKW Tower 2 in Songpa-gu. You better get going you two." Dad said and he winked at me. "Annyeong, abeoji. See you tonight."**

**Haneul and I walked to the hall and I turned to her. She is prettier than ever and hot. Wait? I thought I'm gay. "Haneul, how are you?" I asked stupidly. Is this how guys act around a girl? "I'm fine, Siwon. I know what you want to ask me. I don't have a boyfriend." She said coolly. Wow she is hot and cool. "Let's have lunch, I'm hungry." I said. I took her hand and headed to the elevator. As we waited the awkward moment kicks in. Why am I feeling like this?**

**Ha Neul**

**I'm Kwon Ha Neul, childhood friend of the hottest Super Junior member Choi Siwon. My dad raised me as a demure lady but why do I feel like I want to jump on him right here. You're a professional Haneul and not a slut, control yourself. You finished college and became a licensed Civil Engineer for nothing. The elevator dinged and we stepped in. The room gets hotter by the minute as I could feel his hand on mine. He stepped before me which made me step back until I was pinned on the wall. "Han-han, do you know that you're so hot with your outfit?" he said. "No I don't think so. Can you expound further?" I said. I thought he will simply describe me but then he took my lips with his and kissed me sweetly. The kiss went from sweet to passionate. He kept licking my lower lip for permission but I don't want to. The place is so inappropriate. I broke the kiss but he pinned me down. "Do you know that I'm living with someone? I really don't know what's with you that made me feel like this." The elevator doors opened and I was shocked who was there standing before us. "Choi Siwon! What the heck are you doing?" Siwon turned around and gasped. "Jiwon-noona?"**


	17. Dilemma

**Dilemma**  
><span>Chapter 17<span>  
><em>by Dory the Fish<em>

I don't know what took over me when I kissed her. It just happened. I could feel her beneath me and her breast pressing against my chest. I wonder what her cup size is. God please forgive me. Before I could even go further, I heard the elevator dinged and the doors were open. I turned around and I was shocked to see her. "Jiwon-noona?" is all I could say. Before I could greet her she dragged me out of the elevator. I saw Haneul bowed and I mouthed "Mianhe." She pointed my pocket and told me to call her later. "Siwon, what are you doing? Is this what you've learned with the work that you do?" noona said. "Noona, we just met and you're already hot tempered." I said and hugged her. "It's been a while since I last saw you. But I'm not glad to see you making out with your childhood friend. I mean I know that you're living with Heechul. Are you sure that you love him or you're just with him for the sex?" Jiwon said. "Noona, I love Heechul so much, and you know that. By the way, we will have dinner tonight. I'll introduce Heechul to mom and dad." I told her. "Ok. But please if you will just break Haneul's heart please stop it before you could make a move. You will not only break little Haneul's heart but also Heechul's." she said and patted my head like a little pup. "I've got to go, I have a lunch meeting and I'm late." She left me by the corridor leading to the comfort room. Everything made me think of what she said. I have to tell Heechul about the dinner tonight.

I left the Dong Kwang Neul Land Corp. Building and headed to my pad. I just can't get over Haneul. Now I know that I'm bisexual I have to tell Heechul about this. I have to. I arrived at the apartment complex 4PM and went directly up to my floor. When I reached at my penthouse I looked for Heechul. "Heenim, I'm home." I heard someone ran towards me like a little kid and hugged me. "I missed you my Simba." I tugged him under my chin and took in his scent. "Get ready Heenim we are going out tonight." I said. We were walking towards the master bathroom where the Jacuzzi is. "Where are we going my King?" Heechul asked as he slowly undressed me. He started with my suit then my long sleeves. "We're going to my parents' place. I'll introduce you to them." Heechul stopped what he was doing. I was about to undress him but he shoved my hand away. "Bwoh? What's wrong?" I asked him. I grabbed his hand before he could leave the room. "You know that people here are not open about this kind relationship, right? Why do I need to meet your parents, especially your infamous father, Choi Kiho?" he said. "I just want them to know that we are officially dating. Besides, Jiwoon noona knows about us." He is still not buying my idea. I can tell it in his eyes. "Do you know that I don't commit to a relationship seriously?" he said. "No I don't. Now that I do, the more that I am privileged that I have you in my life. That's why I'm introducing you to my parents." I said. I caressed his cheeks as he slowly looked at me instead of the floor. "Since you confessed something, I have to tell you something that you don't know about me yet. I'm bisexual Heenim." I said. His hold on me around my waist grew tighter pulling me closer to him. He planted a kiss on my neck. He leaned to my ear, "I love you. I'm okay with that. Just promise me one thing." He tilted his head to his right and played with my hair. "Don't cheat on me. Let's have trust in this relationship." he said. Then it struck me. I remembered what happened in the elevator with Haneul. My thoughts were cut short as Heechul's lips touched mine. "Heehee" I gasped, no its more like a moan. "Heenim. Let's prepare for dinner." I finally said to him.

After an hour of battling Heechul's sexy lips and moans, we were ready to leave for the dinner at my parents' house. "Mom, I know you've met Heechul before as a friend of mine. I want you to meet him as my Queen. Heechul, meet my mom, Choi Mae Ri." I said. My mom approached Heechul and gave him a peck on his cheek. "Abeoji, meet Heechul, my Queen." I said. "Of course I met Heechul. Let's have dinner, shall we?" As we went to the dinning room, my sister is talking to someone. It's a lady that I met this morning but I know her since childhood. "Ahhh Haneul~ssi, its good that you came here tonight. It's been a while since we had dinner. Heechul~ssi meet Kwon Ha Neul a family friend" abeoji said. Haneul is wearing a perfume I couldn't resist. She offered her hand to Heechul and he hesistantly shook it. "Oppa!" Yuna my precious niece came running from the stairs and greeted me with her sweetest smile. "Yuna. I missed you." I said. I hugged her. She pulled away and she noticed Heechul. "Oppa, is she your girlfriend?" I looked at the direction at where she is pointing at and she is talking about Heechul. "Yes she is my girlfriend." I said and gave her a kiss on her cheek. At least someone in this house approves.

During dinner I noticed something wrong in this picture. One is that my dad is too silent but keeps at staring at Heechul. Two Jiwon talks to Haneul too much. She is not talkative towards anyone. Three Heechul is quiet. The last one bothers me too much. As soon as dinner was finished I excused us, me and Heechul, to talk privately in the garden. I took his hand and we walked outside. "Heechul, you're too quiet. Is there something bothering you?" I said. We sat by the fountain in the heart of the garden. "How much do you know that Haneul bitch?" he asked. "I knew since I was 5. We played around my dad's office since her dad and my dad are good friends and they both run the company." I said. As explained this to him I could feel his grip grew tighter. "Heenim, are you alright?" I said. "Are you jealous?" He simply nodded and I took him in to my arms. "You don't have to worry about her. To be honest I liked her when we were kids but everything changed when I met you." I assured him. He simply hugged me back.

We walked back in the mansion and my mom told me to take Heechul a tour of the house. "Okay umma. Hmm where should we start?" I said. "How about your room?" Heechul whispered. "Heechul we can do that later, not here, arraseo?" I said. Heechul stammered out of the house and left me. I ran after him out of the door but Haneul stopped me. "Wonnie, where are you going?" she asked. "I'm going after my love. Excuse me," I said. I saw him by the car. "Heechul, do you want to go home?" I asked. He simply nodded. "Wait here, I have to inform abeoji that we're leaving." I said and ran back to the house.

The drive back to home is not an easy one. Heechul is still quiet and he is not holding my hand. This is really bothering me. I decided to stop by the gasoline station to park. "Heechul, this is not you. You are too quiet. I mean for other people its normal to be silent but you are Kim Heechul. Being silent is not in your system. Please tell me what's wrong." I said. I took his hand and caressed it with mine. "I think your family doesn't approve of our relationship. The dinner was awkward and that bitch came into the picture." I was expecting that he would say that. I was not expecting that Haneul would come in to the picture. "Heechul you don't have to worry about them. You wouldn't care about how other people think about you. There are 2 things that you should know about tonight. One I don't need their permission. Two, Haneul is no one to me. Please stop worrying." I said.

We parked at the gas station for 10 minutes, I'm still holding Heechul's hand while he is still silently sitting beside me. I looked at him and he looked at me with that gaze I've been looking for all night. "I love you, Kim Heechul. Remember that." I leaned closer to him and my lips found his.

I couldn't remember a thing from last night aside from the fact that we made love in my car parked at a gas station in Seoul. I hope no one saw that. I choked my words as I surfed the net. "Choi Siwon making out at a Gas Station in Seoul!" What the heck! Antis are everywhere too. I grabbed my ringing phone. "You better come here at the hospital. Abeoji had a heart attack. Pali pali!" Jiwon noona said. I quickly prepared to leave. "Simba good morning. Where are you going?" Heechul said and gave me a peck. "There is an emergency at my parents' place. I have to go and check. Will you be alright here?" I said. "I'll be ok. I'll be leaving in a few minutes anyways." he said. "I better get going, Heenim. Annyeong. SMS me when you get to your commitments." I called out before the elevator doors closed shut.

As I arrived at the Choi Mansion, I saw the ambulance leaving the estate. I didn't hesitate to follow the ambulance and called Jiwon. I was right that abeoji is in that ambulance. God please deliver my abeoji away from harm. As I arrived at the hospital I ran to the emergency room I saw umma and I hugged her. "Abeoji will be alright, mom. God will protect him." I said. "Siwon I know you're a good person. We brought you up just right." She said. I'm afraid where this conversation is going. "What I'm trying to say is, we've given you freedom but I hope that you wouldn't abuse it. Happiness has its limitations." umma said. She gave me a hug and I whispered to her that God will protect abeoji. Even if my mom didn't tell me the reason why dad had a heart attack I know the reason. It's because of that malicious report this morning.

I sat beside my mom and waited for the doctor's advice. A few minutes later Haneul arrived. I don't know why I feel relieved when I saw her running towards me. Does this mean something? I hope not. I love Heenim. I love Heechul. I love my Queen.


	18. Crossroads

**Crossroads**  
><span>Chapter 18<span>  
><em>by Dory the Fish<em>

**Heechul****'****s****POV**

It's the rehearsal for the 5jib and I have to work with the rest of the members. It's almost lunch time and I guess Siwon is not coming. I really don't know what I should do with Hangeng. I mean I want him beside me forever but I don't want to loose Siwon. Am I being selfish? I don't want to choose but I know that someday I have to. Which feeling is stronger, love or lust?

We were given a quick break so I decided to check my twitter. I just can't help it to be a twitter whore anyway. As I checked my twitter, there is news that broke my heart. Crap Siwon, you should have told me about this kind of emergency. As I read the news over and over, I could feel tears flow from my precious eyes. "Wae? Why are you crying Heechul?" I heard someone from behind me. I turned and saw Hangeng giving me that worried look of his that I always find it his aegyo. "I have to leave. Siwon's dad is in the hospital." I said. I kept clutching my phone. Moments later I felt the warmth of his hand and dragged me towards our manager. "Hyung we need to leave, something came. It's an emergency." Hangeng said. "It's a family emergency and he needs a friend to stand by him." he said. Hyung looked worried and anticipated that I wouldn't speak about how I really feel so he let us go.

Hangeng literally dragged me out of the recording studio and led us to the parking lot. He asked for my car keys and he drove us to the hospital where Siwon's father is. "Hangeng, Kamasahamnida." I said. We arrived at the hospital a few minutes later.

**Siwon****'****s****POV**

As we waited I saw Haneul running towards me. "Siwon, I came as soon as I heard. How's ahjussi?" Haneul said as she gave me a hug. "The doctor said abeoji is in stable condition. I thank God for saving him from harm. But I blame myself for what happened." I said. I broke down in front of her. "You shouldn't blame yourself, Wonnie. Why do you blame yourself anyway?" she said. I was thinking of Heechul and how strong my feelings for him. But then Haneul is here before me. Haneul, lady of my life she is my past, Heechul my Queen is my present. "Why do you lure me in, Haneul?" I stepped closer to her as we were just centimeters away. I couldn't help but feel my boner growing because of her lovely outfit that brings out her assets. Those curvy hips that compliments well with her perfect legs, plus her slender back which gives her mounts that I want to hold. I found her lips and the tongue action begins. I pinned Haneul to the wall and she was feeling me as her hands explored my back.

**Heechul's****POV**

As I entered the emergency room I approached the nurse at the reception area and asked for directions. I told her that I'm the half brother of Siwon and used my charisma to have the stupid information where my Simba is. I don't like the feeling as I approached the room where his father is. Hangeng is just behind me ready to back me up or something. As we turned left leading to the private rooms my world shattered. "Yah! Siwon" I called out as he is kissing that bitch from last night. "Heechul?" he said. I was shocked why I decided to come here and support him when he has this bitch with him. He noticed that I have my company too. "Hangeng, I thought you guys were recording." Now he is questioning why I'm here. What the? "I thought you need someone to comfort you that's why I came here. I guess I was wrong." I said. I took few steps back.

**Hangeng's****POV**

I want to smack Siwon so that he would land flat on his face. But this is not the appropriate time and place for that. I have to think about the brotherhood that we want to keep. I guess they need to talk things out. I was about to sit but then Heechul pulled me. "What are you doing?" I asked. "We're leaving. I'm not needed here so we need to go back to our recording." I want to argue with him but the pain painted all over his face made me run away with him.

**Choi****Siwon****why****did****you****do****this****to****Heechul?**

That ran through my mind as I took his hand and ran towards the parking lot. When we turned to the door I saw Siwon glued to the ground and tears running down his face. Haneul hugging his back, comforting him I guess. I don't care about how Siwon feels right now. The one that needs comfort is Heechul. As we walked towards the car, I could hear his sobs. "I shouldn't drag you out here." I said. I gave him hug that he deserves. I mean after what he saw he needs someone to cling on. I should set aside my hate for Siwon. "Why are you blaming yourself when you were just concerned about me?" he said. "How could he do this to me? Hangeng, what did I do for him to do this to me?" he said. I don't know why Siwon did that. I'm wondering the same thing. I felt my phone ring so I picked it up. "Hyung, we can't go back to the recording, can we ask for the rest of the day off? Heechul needs it and he needs company. Kamsahamnida hyungnim." I said. We were passing by Han River and I thought of something. "Heechul what do you want to do?" I asked. "Let's go back to the recording studio." he said. "I asked hyungnim the day off for both of us so what do you want to do?" I said. Silence filled the atmosphere and he is staring out the window. "Do you want to just hang out by the Han River? Have a little talk." I said. "I guess that is what I need. But let's have dinner first." Hee said.

We ate somewhere and he ate too much than usual. I can tell that he is affected by what happened. "Heechul keep eating so that I could see some meat on you." I said jokingly. He stopped and stared at me angrily. "Yah! What are you talking about? I have meat you know." he said. "You're eating that too much than usual. That's your third helping." I said. "I feel hungry when you're around so stop teasing me." he said and continued to munch down the food in front of him.

We went to buy soju and parked by the riverside of Han River. We parked where no one can see us. "Do you know that we are doing the Super Show at Shanghai tomorrow and I need to deal with Siwon for awhile?" Heechul said. He gulped down 2 shots and I did the same. "Yes I heard. To be honest I didn't expect Siwon can do that in the Hospital. I mean he is God fearing and all that. His action is inappropriate…" I was about to finish my statement but then I heard sobs beside me. "My princess, please stop crying. I have no right to judge Siwon by what he did earlier. You know him better." I said. I stroked his head as I hugged him. I could feel him hugging me back and he cried harder. I hate it when he cries. "I know that I can't make you stop crying so just cry your heart out. Just promise me one thing." I pulled him away and he looked at me. "Once you're done crying because of Siwon having someone else, you'll not cry for the same reason again." I said. He nodded and dug his face to my chest.

**Haneul****'****s****POV**

I can't leave Siwon here alone in the Hospital. He might think of doing something stupid after Heechul left a few hours ago. Siwon is my oppa but I feel something stronger than that. I want to take it to another level. I know why ahjussi is here and it's because of the news this morning about Heechul and Siwon making out at the Gasoline station. Poor Heechul is not accepted in this family. I guess I have to do this. This is for Siwon's future and for the Choi's legacy to continue. Jiwon unni came in the room and I stood up and greeted her. "You guys should go home you've been here all day. Siwon you must send Haneul home. I think you and Heechul should talk. I mean a serious talk." Jiwon said. "Deh. I'll talk to him as soon as possible." Siwon said and kissed Jiwon goodbye. Siwon left the room first and waited outside. "I'm sorry about the incident awhile ago Haneul. Just give comfort him for now. But don't over do it or else you'll be the Petal enemy number one all over the world." she said.

As we left the hospital we had a very silent drive to my house. I hate it when he is too quiet. We arrived minutes after. "Wonnie. I know you're worried about Heechul right now. Just remember I'm here for you oppa.

**Heechul****'****s****POV**

Its morning and I could feel that Siwon slept beside me. It's weird because I woke up before he did. I went to the bathroom to do my daily routine. After that I went to the kitchen to grab something to eat before I pack my bag for the Super Show. I took out the milk cartoon from the fridge and the cereal. I hate mornings because time seems to fly fast in the morning. I went to my walk-in closet and took out the things I need to bring. Of course my Lady HeeHee is a must. Do you think that I don't own the gorgeous outfit? Moments later I heard someone in the showers so I guess Siwon is up. I was about to pack all the things I took out from my closet when I felt someone hugged me from behind. "Yah CHOI SIWON let go of me! Do you think I've forgiven you for what you did yesterday?" I said and shoved him away. I can tell its Siwon because of his familiar scent. "Mianhe, my Queen. I should have" Siwon said. I didn't answer him. I continued packing quietly. I'm talking to him until the show is over. I don't want to talk to him right now. "Go get ready for our flight." I said to him as I pulled my bags towards the bedroom door.

**Hangeng's****POV**

"Hangeng I heard about what happened yesterday at the hospital. I changed Siwon's and Heechul's flight the same as yours." Sooman said as we headed towards Incheon Airport. "Sooman, why are you sending me to Shanghai with them? Its not that I'm complaining but I think I should stay away from them." I said. "I don't meddle with my talent's personal life. But then it's Heechul that we're talking about. It's best that you'll look after him for now. I have a feeling that Heechul will need you." he said. When Sooman's instinct goes up I'll not doubt him about what he thinks. I guess I have to do what I have to do.

When I arrived at the Incheon Airport, hyungnim assisted me to the check-in counter. I just have 2 bags since I'm not performing with them. A few minutes later Heechul and Siwon arrived. They were standing behind and they seemed not to notice me. _Take__note__don__'__t__let__Heechul__and__Siwon__notice__that__you__'__re__with__them._ I thought what Sooman told me before he left the airport. Hyungnim casually talked with them without exposing my presence before them.

I presented my travel documents and slid a special note to the pretty lady.

**Please****don****'****t****mention****my****name**

The lady nodded and continued what she needs to do. "Annyeong!" she said as she gave me my travel documents and my boarding pass. I went quietly to the waiting area and looked back at hyungnim and he nodded as his gesture that it's okay for me to leave him with Siwon and Heechul. A few minutes later I saw them enter the waiting area. I know that this is not necessary but I have to tell Siwon what I think about what happened yesterday. I dialed Siwon's number and "Siwon~ah I just want you to know that I hate you for hurting Heechul. I couldn't even forgive myself for giving Heechul too much pain when I left what more do you think I feel about what you did yesterday." I said. I transferred to a seat away from them since they sat near me. "Where are you hyung?" he asked. "That doesn't matter now. Listen closely Siwon. I appreciate that you took care of him when I left Korea but what you did is unacceptable. If you hurt Heechul again and comes running to me in tears because of you, I'll keep him beside me and treat him better than you did." I ended the call and clenched my fist to the wall.


End file.
